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[04 Nov 2007|12:29pm] |
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mood |
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i love hanging out with you kim! =]
work sucks. i am going to look for a new job this week.
not much else to say.
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[31 Oct 2007|09:58pm] |
you want me out of your life. i am out. but why are you reading my livejournals and talking to people about it? you deleted me so i couldnt read yours, well dont read mine then. it's a waste of your time.
i love my life.
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[30 Oct 2007|12:07pm] |
my finger is so annoying. at least i can still type. hahah.
stunner and i got in a huuuuuuuuuuuuge fight. and like i said, he's not abusive, but last night i pissed him off so bad that he felt the need to punch me in the back. yeah, that was awesome. and then i was trying to leave and he wouldnt let me out of his room and so i was lookin at a magazine and he was like dont touch my shit so i threw it at him and it didnt even hit him so he picked up his moms METAL camera and threw at me and i turned and it fuckin hit my back, in the same place he punched me. ugh. i am sick of it. so i broke up with him, i think. =//. i dont know. but he fucking pissed me off so bad. he cut me down really bad, i did back to him. it was ugly. and finally when i got out to my car he followed me because he had stuff in my car and i got in my car and shut the door and locked it. then i threw his stuff out and when i opened my door he stuck his fingers there and i slammed the door shut. haha i guess that taught him a lesson. at first i didnt even see his fingers there. ugh. it was just a horrible night. i came home and slept and it felt sooooo good to sleep in my bed ALONE and i slept in. it was nice.
i hate this.
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[27 Oct 2007|04:26pm] |
i love working with a meat slicer!
i have never had stitches before until yesterday! haha jordan wrights dad stitched me up.
i suck at life. haha
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[25 Oct 2007|07:35am] |
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mood |
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 crappy |
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i nubbed out so bad on my midterm in history. i knew the shit but when i got the test my head went empty. i dont know. whatever. i can bring it up. i have done it manyyyyyyyyy times before. lol.
i have saturday off. =]. i NEVER get a saturday off but it's because they screwed up. i asked for last saturday off for homecoming and they actually scheduled me to work but my boss got someone else to cover my shift and then i ended up getting this saturday off too. haha it pissed her off because she said i was going to work since i didnt last weekend. hahahaha suckaaaaaaa.
stunner and i got in a HUGE fight the other night. it was horrible. it got physical, bad. it scared me. he was keeping me locked in the room and wouldnt let me leave. it was scary. i dont think i have been that scared in a while. i hate it because i ask him to get off me or not touch me and he still does it so i push him off and he thinks i'm "hitting" him when all i am going is pushing him off or sometimes i use my feet and i dont full out kick him i just shove him with my feet and he says i kick him so that night he did it back to me but ten times as hard. it sucked. he popped me in the back and my back still hurts. now dont get me wrong, he isnt abusive or anything just that night if i tried to "push him" he hit me. i did slap him a few times because i was getting so pissed and frustrated and then he would do it back. ugh. that explains the migraine i had yesterday. =///. i hate it. i just wnat to be alone.
time for a nap.
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[23 Oct 2007|06:05pm] |
mmmmmmmm. i make such awesome grilled cheeses it's unreal. haha.
class was ok. my day was boring. i have been thinking about what i want to get my brother for his birthday since i am leaving the day of his birthday. =//. hmmm. some kind of picture. i just have to think of the perfect thing.
ryan didnt come up. =[[[. poor guy.
time to watch my show. =]
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[22 Oct 2007|08:35pm] |
i got my halloween costume! yeahhhhhh! i am going to be a CUTE little black cat. not a skank. haha. dressing up like a skank is lame. like last year when i dressed as a fairy, it wasnt skanky, it was cute and maybe a little sexy but not skanky. i hate skank outfits. i feel embarassed for people when they wear them.
i am exhausted and i was really excited to see ryan this week but he got in an accident and couldnt make it up just yet. i'm glad he is ok, just a few bumps and bruises. =[[[.
this show i love new york cracks me up. she is so materialistic it's ridiculous.
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[21 Oct 2007|11:34am] |
homecoming was ok. it was pointless for me to go with hannah because i knew she was going to hang out with her friends, and of course she did and i'm not mad about it but it was kind of a waste of my time and stunner doesnt really like dancing, well he didnt this time, and it was lame and i am wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy tooooooooooooo old for it.
the after party was pretty fun. didnt get completely drunk but felt pretty good. lol. hung out with a lot of cool people. i got better pictures after homecoming than i did when i was there.
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[17 Oct 2007|08:15am] |
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mood |
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after yesterdays fight with my mom and realizing that her goal in life is just to make me feel like shit and just cut me down, i decided that i am going to move to north carolina. it will be the best thing for me. a fresh start, new friends, a chance to spend some good, quality time with my brother because i need it really bad. this will be my push to help me finish growing up. i think my mom makes me feel like that because she is realizing that i am definitely not a little girl anymore and that soon i am going to be leaving her, for good.
i texted my brother while i was at work and asked him if he still wanted me to move down and of course he said yeah and asked why. i told him that i was more than ready to get out of here. he said, ok good. but then he asked again why i was ready and i told him that our mom is a psycho bitch and he said ok, gotcha. haha. he knew what was up because i called him the other night when my mom locked me out and left him a message that said DJ! MOM IS A FUCKING CUNT! hahaha. he called back and was like uhhh yeah, i got your message. i was like yeah, self explanitory.
i was thinking about this yesterday, charlie and devin have been bugging me to move in with them for the past couple months, well yesterday i think i made my decision. i am going to call them today and ask them if they still want me to. i am only going to take a few belongings that i NEED and then pack up the rest so when i move i will have it ready. sounds good to meeee.
but yeah. hopefully by the end of may i will be out of this state, possibly forever. so only 7 or 8 more months in michigan for me.
i miss being 8 years old and having all my family here.
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[16 Oct 2007|08:43pm] |
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mood |
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got in a huge fight with my mom today. cried a whole bunch, she didnt give a shit. basically i have to start leaving my window cracked open because she is going to start locking the house when she isnt here and that means i cant be in the house when she isnt. it's a new rule or somet shit. i hate her
played pool with eric. it was pretty fun. haha.
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[15 Oct 2007|06:58pm] |
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mood |
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well the soccer game was pretty intense but before we got there my mom called me because i accidently left a dirty dish with food in it on the counter so she got all pissed and when i came home from the soccer game she had all the fucking doors locked!!!!!!!!
she is a fucking cunttttttttttttttttttt. i haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I HATE MY MOM! I HATE PATRICIA ANN CANADY! SHE SUCKS AT LIFE! YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
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[15 Oct 2007|02:52pm] |
when i was twelve i started collecting and reading the chicken soup for the soul books. well there was a story about a girls father passing away and from time to time i think about that story and how the girl dealt with the situation and i remember reading that the girl started wearing her fathers neck ties to school because he collected them and she wanted to share that. well today i was browsing through some of those books and i found that story about that girl. and that girls name was katie!!!!!!!!!
fuckin weird.
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[15 Oct 2007|07:22am] |
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mood |
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frustrated |
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since hannahs mom hasnt had a car, i've been driving her to school for the past two weeks. since i found out i am going to north carolina i want to save my money hardcore because i do have to pay my brother back for the plane ticket. i told hannah i couldnt drive her to school anymore. i have to save money for north carolina. she said that's fine. well yesterday she called me up saying she would give me money, i said i didnt want her money to drive her to school and i asked her what the big deal was about riding the bus and of course she threw a fit and said i hate the bus and i dont wanna ride it. so now she's mad because i didnt fucking drive her to school! she wasnt mad at me when i wasnt driving her before. wtf.
she posted this bulletin:
i'm in a bad mood.
people piss me off.
i hate when someone won't do one little thing for me when they know that i'd do it for them if they asked me to.
it really bothers me.
i am seriously sick of her trying to guilt trip me and make me feel like shit. i dont need this stress. it's bad enough that everything i eat makes me sick, gives me heartburn, or makes me want to puke. my stress level is wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy above where it needs to be. i am seriously secluding myself from everyone this week. i dont even want to go to homecoming but of course i am wasting money for hannah because she wont go unless i do.
i'm done. i am going to become anti-social. it will save me the pain.
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[14 Oct 2007|06:36pm] |
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mood |
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depressed |
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weekend was mediocre.
Friday: my mom is a bitch. lol worked twelve hours. yeah, it sucked.
Saturday: woke up at like noon, melanie called, watched some ANTM! went over to melanies, took her and blake some dresses to try on for homecoming and melanie is going to wear one of my black ones. she fell in love with it. haha i love those girls. haha. was supposed to work till ten but i left at like quarter after nine. it was extrememly slow.
Sunday: woke up at like noon again, stepdad is in the hospital in ICU, layed around for a while, stunner and i fought as usual, almost broke up, ugh. we're good now though. went to dinner at the Au Sable with the Tait's girls. it was fun. i love those girls. we had fun. too bad i'm not 21 yet.
friday i found out that i am going to north carolina for thanksgiving. i cant wait. i love my brother and i cant wait to see him.
lots of homework and studying. =[.
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[12 Oct 2007|08:09am] |
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mood |
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 ecstatic |
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yeah. going to north carolina for thanks giving!!!!!!!!!!! i am so fucking happy right now. my brother called me with the flights and it's only gonna be $247!
but other than that today has been shitty. there are people blocking my driveway and i cant get out for work and my mom felt the need to hit me this morning! wtf! she's a bitch. it took everything i had not to turn around and punch her in the fucking mouth and it was all over clothes in the dryer!
anyways. time for work. ugh.
glens 10-4
taits 4-close [10ish]
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[10 Oct 2007|09:48pm] |
what a mother effing day! it really wasnt that great. didnt start out great, isnt really ending great. it's just been a long week and it's going to be a long weekend.
yesterday stunners dad called me his daughter. it was cute.
homecoming. i dont want to go. it's not fun when i am this old. prom was kinda fun last year, but that was prom. this is homecoming with a bunch of kids that are wayyyyyyyy younger than i and i just dont want to see any of them. hannah wants me to go, if she still does, who knows. stunner doesnt care either way but he is sick of hannahs shit because she gave him dirty looks all day so of course he was bitchin to me about it because it was about something that i said or something. i dont know. it's ridiculous. he is sick of how spoiled and how the world revolves around her.
in my history class we talked a lot about the first 13 colonies and what not and of course north carolina was one of them and the whole time i kept thinking of my brother and going down there and what not. it's driving me nuts. that's all i can think about at this point.
this kid in my calc class added me on myspace which is weird because the other day i found him on lydias list and i was going to add him but i forgot to later. weirddddddd. he's weird. haha. him and his friends are weird.
alright, time for bed. work early in the morning. i was supposed to work 4-9 but i got switched 9-6. which is good, more hours. =]
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[10 Oct 2007|07:18am] |
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mood |
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dude, she fuckin pissed me off so bad this morning. i am sick of this moody bullshit. it's not fair to me. whatever. no one cares how i feel anyway.
is there really a point to be here anymore? no. i cant make anyone happy. i fuckin suck at life, seriously.
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[09 Oct 2007|07:22pm] |
it's been a pretty shitty day.
='[
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[08 Oct 2007|07:33pm] |
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mood |
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crappy |
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so today wasnt that great of a day. my mom kept finding stuff that was evidence to a party. haha. surprisingly she didnt freak out that much.
everything irritated me today. the heat is making me grouchy. after i took my calc test i was in a bad mood. i have a lot of homework to do tonight because i have to work tomorrow before class. =/.
it's just been a bad day. =[ the only good thing was i cleaned out my car so it's not all grubby looking and i got to watch my favorite show.
good night.
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[08 Oct 2007|07:03am] |
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mood |
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calm |
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i slept kinda crappy last night. i couldnt get comfortable. but i remember looking out my window and seeing lights reflect off the lake. it was gorgeous.
i have a test in calc today. not really looking forward to it. =//. i just want to sleep and relax and i definitely know that's not going to happen. i have homework to finish tonight because i have to work at taits tomorrow before class. =[[[. i have scheduled myself to work a lot this week. i'm already worn out.
ew, i just heard a gunshot.
alright, bye.
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